We just got through with a challenging couple weeks of personally being sick during the Covid-19 pandemic, thankfully not with symptoms of the illness but something else. Nonetheless….not a great time. Rather anxiety-inducing as you can’t get into the doctor and even picking up an Rx is a process. So glad to be moving toward the other side.
In the midst of feeling really crummy and being confined I’ve been finding in each day little moments of celebration. They’re ours and we relish them. Whether its a new recipe, spending time together, talking to an old friend, or just meditating more, helping with homework, sitting with our fur babies, I am finding there are a ton of moments in the in-between days that aren’t so bad. For those, I am so grateful.
We are wired for connection despite the social distance. I loved that we’ve been finding new and different ways of connection; FaceTime, zoom, all the different conferencing options. I found it a bit ironic in the midst of this, my printer died. Given that papers seem to be the bane of my existence. Maybe I don’t want a printer at all, like ever. The notion is charming.
And yet, I gave in and ordered the damn replacement. All the paring life down really makes one ask, do I even need this at all? Not in a Marie-Kondo – does this spark joy kind of a thing, but do I even need or want this, any of this? Some things are life and work necessities. So it goes. However, I’m finding it a lot easier to say no. It’s been a heck of a lot easier to just say no and not feel guilty in these times. Does anyone else find that to be so?
The other thing I do find and am loving…we are connecting to people and things that matter – more than ever before. It’s beautiful. The neighbors playing the cellos with social distance. Old friends sending me a photo from a show I once did. Family just messaging to ask what we thought. Friends I haven’t seen in years, setting up a virtual happy hour, and seeing so many different ways creativity is unfolding and connecting. Seeing art move and thrive. It feels good. It feels different. And I hope that continues.
In the quiet moments, we’re seeing when we set our minds and hearts on something; our resolve is fierce. We can weather most anything. There’s so many emotional moments and since we’re moving slower we notice them and we feel them. We feel the heartaches, too. But, in that, I see so many people making the time to use their voices and abilities for good.
For me personally, meditation, prayer & staying connected to others, have always been saving graces. Even if it’s something as simple as sharing a recipe or a meme. They are still very grounding and oddly give a sense of peace & hope. I somehow found 1.5 hours to meditate today…that never happens and it was beautiful.
This life is imperfect and uncertain. It was a bit before this. A new normal, maybe. It doesn’t bother me as much these days. We are learning in this process…continuing to learn. I’ve seen more learning going on and less busy. That is something. I am sure it’s a good thing. I’m sure us listening and being kinder is also a good thing. I see the hearts and inspiration on windows ushering us on. It lifted my heart.
I’ve seen more resolve. Care, compassion, love and support. It’s refreshing. I hope this is one of the things that lasts.
I’ve heard from more old friends than in a long time. I love this. Thank you friends for that. Your words, hellos, levity and effort means so much more right now.
I’m thankful for each day. Like really seriously thankful. And somehow because there are fewer have-to’s there’s no guilt in taking the time to just be. That is new. I thought I’d learned this from cancer. But life continues to teach us what we need.
Being sick and struggling or just being uncomfortable- all make one appreciate how much we sometimes take for granted.
At the end of the day, this Tuesday… I find listening to my intuition rather than my fear, sustained me. Finding a project or two I can complete, making space for the things and the people I want, gives me an immense sense of joy and a sense of purpose. Knowing I’m on the mend, feels better than before. I can’t wait to get back to yoga, barre and dance. I can’t wait to laugh and do silly hiphop moves with the kiddo of manage the next tick tock challenge she suggest. I can’t wait to get back in the garden and plant things. I can’t wait to write and photograph and create. I can’t wait for the next travel adventure…I can dream it up while I’m waiting. I can’t wait for the next thing. I can’t wait to simply be here, now.
As we’re in the midst of this time, find a project you’ve put on the back burner, a box you can sort through, revisit, toss and move on. This is the time for curating our spaces, our minds, our work, and our energy. There are a millennia or projects and possibilities. This time; it is strangely a gift. I’m looking forward to getting back to finding these projects (and a bit of myself) and; making space, making progress, really savoring that feeling and living through each and every day. One at a time.
I’d love to hear what you’ve been learning during this time. What projects or activities have you chosen to dive into and how have they affected you and your time. What are the best parts? Which the moments and differences do you hope to carry forward?
Sending you calm, clarity and wellness in the days ahead to take each moment as it comes. I hope you find your strength, and that you’re reminded, together, we are stronger than we know.